The title of the book “How to win friends and influence people” written by Dale Carnegie is as misleading as the title of this post. Even though this book had been first published in 1936, it is still relevant today. In this post, a few ways will be discussed on how to connect with people.
Imagine you are calling your doctor’s office. Would you prefer a receptionist who is grumpy or a receptionist who is in a good mood? I reckon it is the latter. Well if you talk while smiling, it is going to come across as more genuine. Even over the phone. It will also brighten your own mood!
A person’s name is the most important sound in any language
If you remember a person’s name and use it the next time you see her/him, it makes them feel important. It shows that you made an effort to remember their name when in reality people don’t even bother. In the book, Dale Carnegie writes ” We should be aware of the magic contained in a name and realize that this single item is wholly and completely owned by the person with whom we are dealing, and nobody else.”
Talk in terms of the other person’s interest
We all would rather talk about our own interests. But if you are really interested in the other person, you should approach the conversation in terms of their interests. Find out their passion and start the conversation with those subjects. The other person will gladly talk for hours about themselves, their accomplishments, and their interests. Once they are warmed up to you. They will gladly listen to your request. Also, be fully present when someone is being vulnerable towards you. They are sharing part of their story and they will appreciate it more when you fully focus on them.